Flatirons Golf Course, Friday, October 17, 2019.  WHS Class of 1971.

October, 2019.   Boulder, CO

The WHS Crew from the Class of 1971 managed to find a date, late in the season, when all were available, and Flatirons Golf Course in Boulder, CO was beautiful and uncrowded.  We set off at 10:00 am, all dressed in purple and gold.

Mick is in charge of the games for the round.    Rubiks cube is easier to understand with chits and skins  and scores and carry-forwards and teams changing every 6 holes.  It’s a good thing that Mick got a perfect ACT score in Math back in high school.  Using an arcane algorithm that would make Fibonacci blush, Mick manages to win every match.  Time was  when Mick couldn’t play with the group, and he still clipped us each for ten bucks.  I think he should go to work for the OMB in Washington.  

Devine got himself a new driver, courtesy of WHS ’70 pal Jim Dugan— replacing the Studebaker that we’d all grown fond of.  But times change, persimmon loses its tensil, the square lines of the old Studebaker created wind vortices on the tee box which interfered with nearby air traffic, so it went the way of Disco and the Edsel and Benito Mussolini.  Watch for it coming soon to Ebay or Second Swing.

Harley’s “set” of club comes from garage sales in Castle Pines for, oh, twenty or so years.    Estimates range from $10 to $50 for the set, not counting the wedge he broke over his knee at Marianna Butte a few years ago.  But he must know how to pick used clubs, because this was his third time out for the year and he wound up with the Shot of the Day and the Rino Cup for short-game mastery.  I think we should carbon date his seven iron.  And copy his swing.

Hanson’s driver was the top of the line from a company that, for some reason, decided never to make golf clubs ever again.  Now they make shirts and shoes and do asphalt repair.    There’s a big cavity on the plate of the club, which design, long ago was considered avant garde, but which is now considered foolhardy.  Maybe Dugan has another driver in his garage?    Nevertheless, owing to body mass and not much else, Hanson consistently drives over one hundred yards.  One.  Hundred. Yards.  Hanson used to play another discredited club line—the Browning 440.  Yes, a firearms company used to make golf clubs.  If Snapchat ever goes into sporting goods, Hanson will be first in line.

Mickster had a stroke a while back. Not a golf stroke, a stroke stroke.  it was scary and sad and lots of bad things.  But Mick thinks it was worth it, because he started eating right and exercising and, voila,  he can drive the ball 300 yards, even more with a fifty mile per hour tailwind at 5280 feet, to a rock hard fairway.  Rennich never had to worry much about over-thinking, at least according to his WHS teachers and law school professors.  It is even less likely now, post-stroke.   So he doesn’t think.  He’s Conan-like.  A beast off the tee.  After that?  Well, not so much.

Rennich won MVG for being the medalist (and modesty prevents me from disclosing the scores), and hitting those monster stroke-assisted drives, over and over.  

Harley with his trophies.

Hanson won the purple putter with a 22 foot birdie putt somewhere along the way, back nine, I think.  It may have been somebody else and it may have been only 4 feet.  Can't recall exactly.  Welcome to my world.

Harley had Shot of the Day and Rino cup.   He chipped in from 11 yards off the green for a birdie for SOD and his masterful short game won him the cup which bears his name.  I think he always wins the Rino cup.  Mick will double-check.

Devine walked away with the most coveted award, Miss Congeniality.  He bought purple shirts for the crew last year, and while there was brief discussion over whether Miss C should only contemplate Game Day congeniality, Devine’e gesture was just so huge, that to DQ him on a technicality would results in “manifest injustice” which has always been the hallmark of Miss C consideration.  Besides, we want to encourage people to buy shirts for us, right Mick?

Miss Congeniality, 2019.

Deliberations.  There is some very high order thinking going on here, thought it's tough to tell by looking.  We look like circus clowns--purple shirts and red faces.  Harley took the shots.

Coal Creek,  August, 2018.

Coal Creek, August, 2018.

(Mick Rennich wrote the copy and Mark Hanson took the photos for the latest golf outing.   –Ed.) 

            It was the best of times, it was the worst of times; it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness. The four of us – Tom “Deac” Devine, Mark “Betsy” Hanson, Mick “the Mickster” Rennich, and Harley “Rino” Rinerson – got together for a second round of golf this year.  Getting together with old friends (we have known each other for sixty years) was a wise decision … we had the best of times; however, playing golf was a foolish decision as the play was unspectacular.  We would have had more fun playing pinochle for five hours.

            We ventured out early – an 8:34 tee time at Louisville’s Coal Creek Golf Course.  The weather was pleasant, in the low 90s by the time we finished; and we were all glad when we finally finished!  Coal Creek is Mick’s home course, but you could not tell by the quality of his play.

            The hardware was evenly divided this time around. Harley, by virtue of the lowest score and the most chits, was easily the best golfer and walked away with the Most Valuable Golfer trophy.  To give readers an idea of the quality of play, take note that Harley shot a 96. There was only one birdie recorded- that by Mr. Hanson on the second hole. Combined, the group accounted for only 9 pars.  

            Tom, by unanimous vote, was awarded the Rino Cup which is given for the best short game.  Deac was superb from green side bunkers and was accused of intentionally hitting into them.  His chipping was the envy of his peers.

            Shot Of The Day was briefly contested, but not for long. Nominations included Mark’s approach shot on the second hole, after which he made the above-referenced birdie; Mick’s approach shot on the eighth hole, after which he missed his fifteen footer; and, Deac’s shot from the bunker to within ten feet on the fourteenth hole.  Other than that, there was not much to pick from; as Harley said, it was difficult to remember many good shots.  Mark was ultimately rewarded with the SOD trophy.

            Mick walked away from the course with two awards.  He won the Purple Putter for the longest putt. His twenty-four footer on the fourteenth hole edged out Mark’s twenty-two foot birdie putt on number two. He also was unanimously awarded Miss Congeniality, albeit after a minor protest from Mr. Hanson.  Mick picked up the cost of carts for the group, bought range balls for all and gifted Deac and Rino with a sleeve of expensive Callaway balls and Mark with five colored golf balls (his favorite kind).  Mick was also on his best behavior, despite playing very bad golf.  Mark’s minor protest centered around Mick paying only for carts, liking it to having a party with a cash bar.  Mark did make a belated run at Miss C when he bought lunch, but the voting was over and the polls had closed by the time he announced his intentions.

            Miss Coal Creek, Holly, a CU student and cross-country runner, supervised the group during lunch and presented Mick with the Miss C trophy.  She also took pictures of the group, using Mark’s very complicated and heavy professional camera.

            In the end – and thankfully it did come to an end – it was the best of times seeing one another.  We have come a long way from Mellette kindergarten and grade school!

                        

The Presentation Ceremony:

May, 2018. Murphy Creek.

Saturday, May 12, 2018
Murphy Creek Golf Course
Aurora, Colorado

The usual gang showed up bright and early Saturday morning, with cloudy skies and the threat of rain.  Mick monitored the weather forecast all week, promised blue skies, and sure enough, just as the group teed off, the sun broke through.  Surely a sign.

Note to file:  Murphy Creek Golf Course is not for the timid, the weak of will, or, it turned out, over the hill sixty-somethings.  This course is a beast.   Harley picked it; he knew of it from his time working at nearby DIA.  There are four par threes on the course--from the tips, the shortest is 205, the longest is 248.  Looked more like 350.  Ouch.

Hanson attended as scribe and photographer--he had suffered a sprained knee in a fall the week before.  (He's working on a story of how it happened, because the truth is pitiful, and ironically, lame.)  And Rennich is more or less fully recovered from a "neurological event" of one kind or another suffered over the winter.  Devine is coming off a knee sprain and other health adventures over the winter.  Only Harley is still fully intact, but he has lots of secrets, including, I'll bet, details of his health.

The golf was pretty sketchy.  To get the idea, the Most Valuable Golfer went to Hanson, who didn't even bring his clubs.  Sometimes you just gotta show up to win.  The scores were a mile high.

Miss Congeniality went to Hanson as well, for coming the longest distance, getting up early, "playing hurt," and who knows what all else.  I think the Competition Committee should meet this coming year to discuss whether to reduce the tournament to six holes, or to change the game to cribbage, instead of golf.

Harley made a 42 foot putt early in round-- he also parred three of the first five holes and we thought it was dejavu all over again, but he returned to earth with a thud later in the round.  On the back nine, Rennich made a 72 foot birdie putt, which earned him Shot of the Day, the Purple Putter and the Rino Cup for his short game.  Other than that, the four of us could likely sit and drink beer, think and think and think and not remember much about the round.  Which may be accounted for by other factors than mediocre golf, right?   These days, we don't remember much, except the lyrics to the theme song from "Green Acres" and of course, "Purple and Gold."

But it was another merry time, and more memories were made, but to what end, since nobody can remember anything anymore?  Here are some photos:

Inverness Golf Course

Englewood, CO

May 12 2017.

Lt. Colonel Rinerson declared war on Inverness Golf Course Friday, and Mick Rennich, Tom Devine and Mark Hanson were collateral damage.

Harley takes his place alongside Don Larsen, Secretariat, Mickey Mantle, with the perfect game, the sweep— winning all categories in a competition that wasn’t even close, ever.  Harley chipped in for a birdie on the first hole, chipped in again for a par and made three birdies.  He birdied the first hole and he birdied the 17th hole.  Harley was a beast! 

Shot of the Day — Pick one— his 25 foot birdie, the chip in after a scuffed shot out of environmentally sensitive terrain, his 175 yard six iron to 12 feet on 17, any number of thermo-nuclear drives, the other chip in.   Of the top ten shots of the day, Harley had eight of them.  Maybe more.

MVG:  Unanimous.  instant.

Inverness Gol Club. May 12, 2017.

Longest Putt:  Harley, of course.  25 footer, front nine.

Rino Cup for Short Game.  Automatic.

Miss C — with this sort of whup-ass on the competition, Rinerson may have been forgiven for being a little harsh with his fellow competitors, a big shot with the three losers it was his misfortune to have to play with.  But he was charming and supportive — the fair Hilton Waitress of the Year, pictured below, obviously is quite taken with Harley’s congeniality.  So it was over quickly and Harley had to rent a U-Haul to schlep his schwag down I-25 to Castle Pines Parkway.

Devine demonstrated extraordinary courage, if not good judgment, by hosting this motley crew at his new club, jeopardizing his good standing in the club almost immediately.  Tom and Deb moved to within a five minute walk of this course, so they’ll get in some rounds, but Tom had only played the front nine before hosting the WHS Tourney.

Harley being presented with his trophies-- The Rino Sweep!

And Miss Congeniality, too!  Miss Hilton seems quite charmed!

The Mickster!

Next time, we’ll be at Marianna Butte, in Loveland. 

Another great day on the links with these guys, pals for nearly 60 years, I'll bet.  Thanks TD, for hosting and buying lunch and thanks, Harley for the clinic.

--HANSON--

--30--